because of my ancestry I'm in a unique position to tell you not to drink or go to church

Last week Caroline Kennedy endorsed Obama in the Times and her politically aware op-ed topped the most emailed list. Today the Washington Post has the Washington Post version: Susan Eisenhower. It's less glamorous, more conservative, equally aristocratic and endorses the same person.

While Kennedy's point of view shook me from my ahistorical complacency because "we need a change in the leadership of this country — just as we did in 1960," Eisenhower's gave me pause because "the last time the United States had an open election was 1952."

These ladies are in a unique position to prove that Obama is "related" to popular presidents, kind of like how geneticists needed to use Thomas Jefferson's legitimate descendants in order to prove that all those black people were related to him.

Anyway, American Spirit Magazine nabbed the most important paternity test results of all.

History professors always tell me that my great-great-[etc.] Uncle George said wise things about staying out of foreign wars, not organizing into political parties, and serving in office for a limited amount of time. Today, while other people see him as a surprisingly clean and articulate African-American, I recognize Barack Obama as embodying all of my uncle's political science ideals. Obama opposed the war in Iraq, reaches across the aisle in order to get things done, and did not serve in any offices for too long.

416 years ago our nation voted for my uncle instead of King George. Today, because of global warming and the rise of computers, it is necessary to change our government for the second time in history. That is why I am casting my ballot for Barack Obama. Together he and I can ensure that all Americans' voices are heard equally.